I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
