you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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