From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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