I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize