i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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