It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
