So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
We left the knife in your bed.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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