how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Randomize
