The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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