youre lurking in front of me
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Randomize
