I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
