Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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