Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize