You were right. It hurts to walk today.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Semen is not good for contacts.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
