Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
i now understand why vodka
Randomize