what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I pour the whiskey from now on
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
