He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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