..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
Randomize
