i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Randomize
