Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
Acid is not a monday night drug
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
