i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize