love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
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