I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
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