it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
