I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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