You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Randomize
