Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I need to calm my uterus...
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
