some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
