escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
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