i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
