So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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