i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
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