i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I pour the whiskey from now on
Randomize
