I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
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