SEEEEXXX PLEASE
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
