He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
