He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
Randomize