Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
