And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
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