so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Randomize
