Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
