i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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