The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
