it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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