It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize
