You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
