im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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