If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Where did you get a picture of my penis
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
