yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Randomize
