the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
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