DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
He's on the porch naked. Help.
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